Archives for June 2013

Today I am…HAPPY!

So, I’ve made blissful some changes in my life lately.

I AM HAPPY! I AM SO FREAKING HAPPY!

source: http://communitygifs.tumblr.com/

source: http://communitygifs.tumblr.com/

Sometimes dreams change. It is strange to admit that my dreams are different now than they were a few years ago, but it is true. So, I’ve had to change a few things around in my world. Thankfully, there is so much love and support all around me!
This is just the best! The. BEST!
I am eating great, real, fresh food & focusing on getting healthy.   Who would’ve ever thought that I’d drink something with raw spinach or kale! Schmoopy is joining in, too. He wasn’t a big green smoothie fan before, not at all, but he is on board now. He feels great, too. YAY US! I’m hooked on www.simplegreensmoothies.com. These girls are amazing!
I feel wonderful.
We’ve also decided to get this baby thing going again. We had a devastating second trimester loss in 2010 & it almost destroyed me. We call it The Dark Times. Everything crashed and I was really lost for a really long time.
Feeling much more whole than I have since then, we are moving forward. It is a long, sad, difficult, & super expensive process. We are starting with IUI for now. If we need to, we will move on to IVF, & then adoption.
We will be parents. I will be a Mommy. Schmoopy will be a Daddy.
We will do this! And it will be EPIC!
I’m also focusing on being creative again.  I’ve taken a few art classes at my local scrapbook shop, a few online, started scrapbooking and Project Life-ing again, and it is just good for my soul. Really good.
And the biggest change of all…I’ve taken a leave from my doctoral work. It is a six month leave for now, but it may be a forever leave. Earning my doctorate was something that I wanted for such a long time. It was a dream.  A big dream. I used to get so excited about my research, the writing, the discovery, the papers (what?!).  Lately, the whole idea of it has been a source of so much stress and anxiety. The spark is gone. The thrill. The dream changed. I agonized over it for a long time. Schmoopy and I had several looooong discussions about it. I’m not a quitter and this was the most difficult part. I had several discussions with my wonderful Mama about this, too. I was raised by two amazing people who taught me to finish what I started and to do all that I do with my whole self. To say that there was some internal conflict is an understatement. I finally made the decision to take a leave and I’m so happy I did! The gloomy cloud lifted almost immediately. The stress levels dropped dramatically, and my heart felt hopeful again. I may return. I may not.
Either way, I’m ok with it. I can do hard things!
source: tumblr

source: tumblr

Whew, lots of info there, huh!?!? Maybe even a little TMI, but I’m good with it all.
There are going to be some awesome changes around here & I’m totally super psyched!
source: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/happy%20birthday%20david%20tennant

source: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/happy%20birthday%20david%20tennant